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August 31st, 2010

I’ve been pretty consistent with catching movies of late, and I’m kinda proud of myself for that. So this past weekend I took the old lady to see this week’s #1 movie at the box office, Takers, mainly because she has a thing for Idris Elba (aka Stringer Bell for my Wire fam), but I didn’t mind seeing it regardless. And since T.I. and Chris Brown were in the flick, going to see Takers just seemed like the cool kid thing to do this weekend.

Takers stars Stringer Bell, T.I., Chris Brown, Paul Walker (from Fast & The Furious), Michael Early (who a lot of hoes promiscuous girls seem to have a thing for too), Hayden Christensen (who was in the new school Star Wars flicks and the Jumper movie) and Matt Dillon & Jay Hernandez played the cops. So basically Takers is about a group of guys (Elba, Brown, Walker, Early & Christensen), led by Stringer Bell, that rob banks and stuff and get away with a bunch of money.

So what happens is T.I., who used to be down with the crew but he got caught during one of their robberies and ends up doing like six years in jail. So Tip gets out of jail, and he goes directly to his old crew with a proposition. The crew doesn’t really trust him, being that the guy just got out of prison, and he seemed to be holding a little animosity towards them, plus Michael Early is fuxing T.I.’s old girl Zoe Saldana, and you can tell T.I. doesn’t really like that, but he tries to be cool about the situation.

So T.I. tells the crew about this job he got through some Russians and they can make mad dough, like millions apiece, if they do the job. But the crew is kinda iffy, like they don’t know if they should trust this country ass nucca. Especially Michael Early, mean, he already took the man’s girl, so it ain’t like him and Tip really had anything to talk about. But the crew seemed to want to do it, so Stringer Bell was like, “I don’t know, but if yall wanna do it, then eff it. Lets get this money.”

Yeah, soooooo, that’s basically the plot. Throw in the detectives (Dillon & Hernandez), some guns and money, and you have the whole movie in a nutshell.

Personally, I thought Takers was pretty good (but it wasn’t better than Twilight or anything). Takers is basically an all male cast version of Set It Off, with less developed characters. Takers is mostly all actions; a lot of gun fire, running, jumping…and to me the best part of the movie is when Chris Brown is running from the cops and gets hit by like 12 cars, jumps over 2 buildings and threw 3 windows, as if the police were chasing him for beating up Rihanna. That was dope, and as an admitted #teambreezy member, I’d say that Chris Brown is officially back after this movie.

T.I. on the other hand…while I know T.I. stans will disagree…he just sucked in this movie. I’m not hating on the nucca as an actor, I liked him in ATL, but Tip is a little bit too country to play the part of a smooth talking criminal. I just didn’t buy it.

My other gripe with the movie is it didn’t have enough hoes promiscuous girls. I mean, I think Zoe Saldana is the only character with a set of boobs that has a speaking role, and that’s not good enough for a high testosterone movie goer like myself.

But I guess the idea was to make an action film starring a bunch of dudes that chicks wanna fux, put them in suits to make them more appealing, and women will trick their men into paying to see the movie. And when it’s all said and done, the movie will be #1 at the box office. Which is basically what happened to me and that probably happened to a lot of nuccas around the country. Which is why Takers ended up making $20.5 million and being the #1 movie this week. They got us fellas.

But I can’t sit here and say Takers isn’t a good movie…T.I. sucked in it, but it’s still a good. If you ask a chick that saw it, she’d probably tell you it’s the best movie ever, but that’s just some bullsh!t. But it ain’t bad.

I’ma give it 3.5 chicken sandwiches:

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4 Responses to “R.E. Movie Review: Takers”

  1. Leezy

    “It’s the best movie ever!” #teamIdris #teambreezy lol

  2. Randy Exclusive

    You would say that.

  3. akshun

    i don’t trust too many women’s opinion when it comes to entertainment. (there are exceptions and they know who they are) i figured this movie would be just cool.

  4. Katgray

    I went and saw this movie last night and I must say I was understimulated. First of all I thought it was gonna be a really smooth gangsta movie like Dick Tracey but instead it was a weak ass version of set it off. T.I’s acting was horrible. He was way too bankhead for this role and he was way over the top. Usually when you’re watching a movie you can tell when its about to end but not this movie, it just ended and I was like “damn, thats it?”. This movie was definitely overated.

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